In the beginning of 2000 I turned 50, lost the hearing in one ear, and got cancer. I was furious. During solitary hikes in the hills these paintings took shape in my imagination. I envisioned the text in these paintings from the beginning. I had memorized much of Ophelia's flower speech when I was a gardener in the '80's but then it was then just a litany of flowers and herbs.

In reading Ophelia's final scene again I realized that my fascination hinged on one word: mad.  To the English "mad" means insane. To Americans "mad" means angry. Ophelia was both, I think, she was furious at the murder of her father and the rejection of her lover, and crazy enough to end up drowned, weighted down by flowers.

And that's how I felt. I was "mad as hell" at having to accept that I am middle-aged and mortal, and I was a little "mad as a hatter"  for about a year after my diagnoses, a time when I didn't feel in sync with the world around me.

Creating these paintings helped.

Nancy Nelson